BUT don't use/buy/dress/talk/walk/blink/enunciate/pronounce/show emotion outside of the prescribed stereotypical gender/sex you were born with.
Lol.
There are a lot of problems this creates for a lot of genders. But I'll let's just look at a few.
1. People are free to practice whichever religion they want. (1) (2) (3) (4)
2. You're not supposed to impose or talk about your opinion on your religion or a certain religion/s with anyone. It's typically a thorny path to burned bridges. (1) (2)
3. People are free to express their own opinion or views on things (to a legal degree I suppose).
4. Not everyone is kind, loving and open-minded —Some hate, demean and/or degrade people. (Pretty sure you're not supposed to do that in any religion, but I could be wrong. Anyone?)
5. If you're to follow the bible completely you wouldn't be able to live as you do now in our modern society. (If you're menstruating you're impure! If someone touches you-hand etc.- while you're menstruating then they become impure!)
6. People like to nitpick what's in the bible. (Gays are bad!...but so are a million other things but let's ignore that.)
7. What consenting adults do behind closed-doors (i.e. their bedroom. i.e. sex) is a private matter and should be of no concern to the public other than those involved.
8. Likening people who are gay to animals (or rather worse than animals) is derogatory, bigoted, unkind and uncompassionate.
9. Science (and life) has already proven that animals engage in "gay" sex for pleasure and/or companionship. (1) (2) (3)
10. Being in a position of influence (i.e. politician) tends to mean you look at things in a legal manner not religious manner. (i.e. Separation of Church and State but hey who does that ever in the PH?)
See YouTuber Philip DeFranco's thoughts about the issue in the video below.
Let's talk about Manny Pacquiao saying "gay people are worse than animals."Because WOW...
Posted by Philip DeFranco on Wednesday, 17 February 2016
11. The LGBTQ community with their friends and families are asking for the legal unions. No religion involved necessary. (but if you're okay with it, which I sincerely doubt, that's good too.)
12. Not giving them (LGBTQ) legal rights, as you would other "straight" couples, is dehumanizing and extremely prejudiced against a certain group. (and not to mention bad...just in case you forgot)
13. Being attracted to the same sex does not make you any less of a human being.
14. Saying (or Acting like) that other people are beneath you (non "straight" people) and do not deserve the same rights you have solely based on what sex they find attractive is idiotic to the highest degree.
15. The bible is literally hundreds of years old and should have no bearing in a progressive, fair and modern society.
16. Religion was made by man. (I mean that's pretty self-explanatory in itself but if you need help- here )
17. You shouldn't be wary of people without religion, you should be wary of people who need religion to be good. (I rely on my conscience to do good and be kind. Maybe some people would be lost and turn to illegal activities if their religion were to cease to exist?)
18. A lot (not all) in the bible is degrading and unfair towards women (1) (2) (3)
19. The bible were stories made by people, hundreds of years ago and were deleted, translated, interpreted, rearranged and edited by other people over time. (1)
20. How do you expect to be civilized human beings when you ostracize others for not liking the same things as you? (Are we in Kindergarten? Di tayo bati pag ayaw mo laruan ko!)
I still respect Manny for his craft and his dedication to boxing. He's an amazing boxer no doubt about that. He has represented the Philippines and has often brought us immense pride with his great passion for boxing. And I will probably continue to support him as the boxer, but I cannot upon my good conscience support him when he said that. (Read I have not lambasted nor persecuted him. I respect his religion as I respect any man's religion. I cannot force someone to like something I like. I heard his apology, whether it was sincere or not it was given when it was due and I appreciate it. But I cannot unhear his words and more importantly the words of others who think gay people should be 'converted' by knowing God. Conversion therapy anyone?.)
I know that it's not new. The super-religious-guy-says-something-against-homosexuals is not new. These are just my thoughts. I have no hate towards Catholicism, Christianity or any other religion (unless that religion is reaally messed-up) and no ill will towards people who practice certain religions. I respect yours and I only urge you to keep an open mind and do the same. *sips hot chocolate*
xx,
CJ
PS. Malamang merong mga pilosopo at sasabihing pano yung mga rapists, pedophiles, mamamatay-tao, magnanakaw etc. Malamang masama yon.
PPS. Civil unions (you know the ones not in church?) help couples with legal benefits in healthcare, insurance, tax breaks and other rights befitting a spouse.
PPPS. But aren't we ALL animals in this world? *thinks deeply while massaging feet*
PPPPS. If you practice any religion (or none) and you do good, help and are kind to other people regardless of their social status, sexual preference, education, race, economic standing etc. then I think you're an amazing human and keep doing what you're doing!
There's not a lot of women's support groups regarding business and entrepreneurship. Or at least they're not as visible. Yes there are ones that are modeled for the general public but they don't "get" the nuances of being a woman and subsequently a woman entrepreneur and may lack the appropriate mentorship, nudge and training some women need.
That's the number one goal of WINGS — to meet like-minded women entrepreneurs and create a positive dynamic team within a nurturing group of professionals for personal growth, business benefits ...and more.
Ava De Guzman - Founder and Director of Bridge of Hope and Wings. Based in California.
WINGS (Women's International Network Giving Support) is an organization of empowered women entrepreneurs and professionals locally and abroad that understand the values of collaboration for enhancing business acumen for financial prosperity and personal fulfillment.
WINGS organization as a whole aims to provide foundational and authentic support to all members including five important resources: Community, Recommendations, Mentorship, Team Support, and Power Partners. As a program of Bridge of Hope - World, a non-profit 501(c)3 organization helping single mothers, abused women, and orphans in the poorest communities worldwide, WINGS will impart and teach the values of philanthropy or charitable giving for common good-will as well as the business credibility edge it brings.
The lovely Ella (who painstakingly made the event run smoothly) kindly invited me to their official launch in the Philippines at Chardonnay by Astoria.
Raw and organic food. Organic body care and handcrafted accessories were available for the attendees.
Everyone was treated to great awe-inducing, heroic, touching and very personal stories of how the speakers' do what they do and what they went through to get where they are now. Believe me their stories were staggeringly incredible to say the least especially Dr. Michiyo Ambrosius's (went to the US from Japan by herself at 20 with a few dollars in her pocket and not a lick of English) and Janet Belarmino's (went through very rigorous training to climb Mount Everest 3 MONTHS after giving birth).
Dr. Michiyo Ambrosius renowned and seasoned Psychologist, Author and Personal Coach based in California.
From left : Janet Belarmino (Most sought after inspirational speaker in Asia and one of the first women in the world to reach the top of Mt. Everest. Based in the Philippines.) and Elaine Leung (Served as the VP of Marketing and Business Development of a successful global IT Consulting firm where she increased revenue from $12 million to $25 million in one year in key growth markets such as healthcare and biotech. Based in California)
Here are some helpful links :
- To see if you have a Wings Chapter in your area or if you yourself want to apply as an ambassador click (here) and to become a member click (here).
- If you just want to observe first there's an upcoming event in Quezon City via this Facebook group (here) Psst...Mention this blog so they know where you got the info ;)
"Commemorative Photo!"
xx,
CJ
PS. She climbed a snowy mountain complete with snow storms 3 MONTHS after giving birth. MIC DROP. And Dr. Michiyo got on a boat (from Japan) with change as travel money and whatever she could carry on her back to make a life in the US while barely speaking English. Did I tell you she studied by translating every single English word in her books and classmate's notes to Japanese using a dictionary just so she could understand the day's lesson? MIC STAND DROP.
http://www.wingsupport.org/
https://www.facebook.com/WINGS4Philippines
Majority of 2015 I was feeling unqualified and insatiable, unworthy and bullheaded. I was feeling down but I didn't really like that; It didn't feel good so I trudged on. I denied what I was feeling and the more I did that and the more my life refused to adhere to what I was envisioning, the heavier my heart sank.
In retrospect I didn't realize that I had a lot going for me this past year, i.e. my blog. It's easy to overlook the small accomplishments in face of your perceived "goals" or success. I like to think I've grown this past year. :)
I already know and understand everything below but I do slip sometimes so I like to remind myself of these nuggets of wisdom. Here are five things I want to take in with me into 2016.
Never compare your life to others
It is extremely easy to compare how your life is going to your peer's when you open your Facebook. Extremely easy. Those "instagram models" and young hot celebrities that go to exotic places before they're even legal to drink can make some put on those emerald green shades.
But you have to understand, what people post on their social profiles are highlights of what they want you to see. Most of these are stories they concocted to make it seem like their life is smooth sailing all the way, but it's rarely that. Everyone has struggles, they might not just post it.
Your success is defined by you. Not by your school, parents, friends and society.
Have a great job after college. Get an amazing house by 30. Have a family before 35. Retire by 40. Have your own thriving start-up as soon as you can. Etc. Etc. Etc. You know how that goes.
Remember, this is your life. Your rules. Success for a fisherman is getting enough to sell and take home for the family whilst success for a CEO might be closing a billion-dollar deal. Success is subjective. It's a state of mind. It differs from person to person.
Celebrate those "small" accomplishments!
Getting up early for 2 weeks straight after perpetually being a night owl. Quitting caffeine after years of being a coffee junkie. Signing up for a dance class when you have two left feet.
Those things might seem inconsequential compared to your other "real" "adult" goals, but habits and long term success start from those little seemingly inconsequential things. So pat yourself on the back. It might not seem much for now but keeping to consistency very rarely doesn't pay off.
If your friendship/relationship becomes toxic. Walk away.
Friends. Family. Business. Bottom line if they're hurting you even after civil communication and trying to understand them, just leave. Not that you should burn bridges, you should just walk away.
It's not giving up. It's choosing your happiness.
Don't be afraid to say yes. Don't be afraid to say no.
It's tricky. "Fear of missing out" is a real and valid thing. It's also not good to agree to everything then force yourself to enjoy it. But once you get to master it you know who to say no to or who to say yes to. Including opportunities.
My blog didn't start picking up until late 2014 to early 2015. At the start of last year, I've been consistent with posts, pictures and updates. I said yes to most opportunities that fell on my lap. Opportunities that made me grow as a professional and as a person and if it weren't for that I wouldn't have met new and interesting people. I wasn't afraid to say no too. Other things that fell on my lap felt off-brand and just off period, so I politely refused. And that's ok.
How about you? Any life lessons you learned last 2015? How are you planning to attack 2016? :)
xx,
CJ
In retrospect I didn't realize that I had a lot going for me this past year, i.e. my blog. It's easy to overlook the small accomplishments in face of your perceived "goals" or success. I like to think I've grown this past year. :)
I already know and understand everything below but I do slip sometimes so I like to remind myself of these nuggets of wisdom. Here are five things I want to take in with me into 2016.
Never compare your life to others
It is extremely easy to compare how your life is going to your peer's when you open your Facebook. Extremely easy. Those "instagram models" and young hot celebrities that go to exotic places before they're even legal to drink can make some put on those emerald green shades.
But you have to understand, what people post on their social profiles are highlights of what they want you to see. Most of these are stories they concocted to make it seem like their life is smooth sailing all the way, but it's rarely that. Everyone has struggles, they might not just post it.
Your success is defined by you. Not by your school, parents, friends and society.
Have a great job after college. Get an amazing house by 30. Have a family before 35. Retire by 40. Have your own thriving start-up as soon as you can. Etc. Etc. Etc. You know how that goes.
Remember, this is your life. Your rules. Success for a fisherman is getting enough to sell and take home for the family whilst success for a CEO might be closing a billion-dollar deal. Success is subjective. It's a state of mind. It differs from person to person.
Celebrate those "small" accomplishments!
Getting up early for 2 weeks straight after perpetually being a night owl. Quitting caffeine after years of being a coffee junkie. Signing up for a dance class when you have two left feet.
Those things might seem inconsequential compared to your other "real" "adult" goals, but habits and long term success start from those little seemingly inconsequential things. So pat yourself on the back. It might not seem much for now but keeping to consistency very rarely doesn't pay off.
If your friendship/relationship becomes toxic. Walk away.
Friends. Family. Business. Bottom line if they're hurting you even after civil communication and trying to understand them, just leave. Not that you should burn bridges, you should just walk away.
It's not giving up. It's choosing your happiness.
Don't be afraid to say yes. Don't be afraid to say no.
It's tricky. "Fear of missing out" is a real and valid thing. It's also not good to agree to everything then force yourself to enjoy it. But once you get to master it you know who to say no to or who to say yes to. Including opportunities.
My blog didn't start picking up until late 2014 to early 2015. At the start of last year, I've been consistent with posts, pictures and updates. I said yes to most opportunities that fell on my lap. Opportunities that made me grow as a professional and as a person and if it weren't for that I wouldn't have met new and interesting people. I wasn't afraid to say no too. Other things that fell on my lap felt off-brand and just off period, so I politely refused. And that's ok.
How about you? Any life lessons you learned last 2015? How are you planning to attack 2016? :)
xx,
CJ
Boy or girl. Man or woman of any age. Have you ever heard of catcalling? Well let me tell you, it's a very powerful thing. It can make your ego and sense of worth soar through the roof just by doing "seemingly innocent" things to other people! *wink*.
You might think that that's dangerous. That you don't want to do uncomfortable and disrespectful things to other people.There're bound to be repercussions right?
You might think that that's dangerous. That you don't want to do uncomfortable and disrespectful things to other people.There're bound to be repercussions right?
And I admit yes, there are. But good news is they're not on your head! The ones who'll feel the negative repercussions are the ones you catcall and the people who notice the catcalling. Over time society in general will think that catcalling is perfectly okay, normal and to be expected. So you won't find anyone stopping you and/or (god forbid) beating you up!
Here are some basic notes to start you on your perverse and satisfying journey.
- Make sure the person is by themselves. Standing or walking on the street (crowded or not) — it doesn't matter.
- Socially acceptable greetings like "Hi/Good Morning/Good Evening Miss/Love/BabeAte", "Hello beautiful/gorgeous/sexy" can be used.
- But if you're feeling like a dog in heat "Sarap/Delicious/Yummy/Yum", "Dayum Girl" "You can sit on my face all day" or "Here puss puss puss" are usable too.
- You can match what you say with a leer, lip smack, smooch noises and "mmmm" sounds as well.
- Make sure they're walking and you're standing, they're standing and you're walking OR you're both walking when you say and/or shout your preferred terms/sentences. This ensures that they won't know who actually said it and/or they'll be too scared/busy to actually stop and confront you about it.
- You can even do it from your vehicle! Just shout or whistle loudly enough for them to hear. You're completely safe because you're on the road and there's an easy getaway. Kinda like drive-thru!
- Remember you can only shout when you're at a safe distance and or when you're with your "bros". There is strength in numbers. And you'd want to impress them with your catcalling skills. Great ego boost and plus points from your friends.
- As much as possible wait until your target and you are exactly parallel and close enough for you to whisper your greetings and/or compliments.
- Yes. Whispering is the medium of choice in the Philippines. This is what discreet people do to not attract any attention from other people they're not catcalling. Whispering is more powerful that way —it's more intimate.
- Don't worry if you think that person's a minor. If they look like a passable adult to you, or even if they don't. Catcall away. It's to condition society that people are and can be like this and getting encounters like this from the streets at an everyday basis is the norm.
- Always remember, if you get caught or if you get confronted. Act innocent. As innocent as the day you were born. Be defensive if you have to. Blame the person for wearing "so and so" because if they didn't want to get attention they wouldn't wear "so and so". Doesn't matter if it's subjective and these are just your opinions. Blame the clothes. Go as far as to say they were "asking for it" then angrily storm off. Don't let them waste your time and kill the ego boost you just got.
Now you're equipped! Go forth and shape society into a mold where these things cannot and will not be stopped.
...
...
THIS IS NEVER OKAY. IT WILL NEVER BE OKAY. AND IT'S NOT ACCEPTABLE.
"Just because it's what's been done, doesn't mean it's what should be done."
I don't know if you can tell but this was a completely sarcastic post. A satire. I tried to justify what comes into these people's minds but it just can't be justified.
"Just because it's what's been done, doesn't mean it's what should be done."
I don't know if you can tell but this was a completely sarcastic post. A satire. I tried to justify what comes into these people's minds but it just can't be justified.
It's really all about power. People who catcall and go as far as to stalk and hurt you if you don't acknowledge their "compliments" do exist and that's a really valid and scary thing.
Stop doing this. Stop people from doing this. Why do they not understand this? Why can't they comprehend? You can try to stop them by a shout to the harasser or a simple "Hey are you okay?" to the one being harassed just to make them feel that you yourself, saw that inappropriate behavior and you're not just gonna turn a blind eye.
xx,
CJ
PS. Yeah I got the quote from Cinderella 2015. It's a great quote.
PPS. These are just SOME of the generous "compliments" women in your life get thrown with whenever they go out alone or in the company of other women.
PPPS. We talk/shout back. We walk faster. We ignore. Nothing so far works as far as my experience has taught me. It's hard to hold them accountable because they'll exclaim innocence and no other person on the street will help you mainly because "It's none of their business."
Image sources : Same from my last post about catcalling.
